I'm only an image of what you see.
You don't know me.
I'm only a figure if you can see my frame.
Fire with no flame.
I'm only a struggle if I get in your way.
You made the road, made the road one-way.
I'm only a woman if woman is a word.
You don't know me.
(words that are not mine. select lyrics from Woman is a Word by Empress Of.)
a few months ago, I was talking to a new acquaintance and told him that I work at a contemporary art center. our conversation wandered to other subjects, but came back to the subject of art. he was honest and overtly curious when he said something along the lines of how he never got much out of artistic experiences. he gave an example of a piece he read an article about. this piece he described was highly conceptual, so much so that it bothered him. because of this discomfort he felt toward the piece, and really throughout his journey with the arts as a whole, he said he didn't get art. I was piecing it together and finding that he assumed all art is designed to make you feel good. my response was simple: art is suppose to agitate you.
art takes something familiar, so familiar that we've almost forgot about it. and then it picks it up, turns it around and sets it back down in a way that we never considered it before. artists do this for us; they help provide the tools for us to open our minds, to expand our knowledge on a subject. and that feeling of letting go of the familiar, can most certainly be agitating.
but, I think we need to stop associating agitation with the negative. ironically, when you process film, you have to agitate the negatives every few minutes to ensure the developer processes evenly.
this act of agitation (in both art and film developing) is meant to stir something up and let it settle in a different way.
for many of us, this isn't an easy concept to accept. we want to cling to what we've always known, as opposed to being humble enough to allow our minds to change. why is it so difficult to understand that your opinions are evolving maybe because you've learned something new? do some people associate learning with fear, by way of the unfamiliar? why can't we accept that we are consistently learning?
given the way the world operates today, i'd say many people are fearful of intelligence. more specifically, fearful of others' intelligence. simply because they didn't think of an idea first, they feel slighted. when they should celebrate these other people's creative ways of thought, instead of responding with jealousy.
this celebration is where collaboration begins. where interdisciplinary thought is achieved and true strides are made to change the habitual thought process of entire societies.
I dream of the day when the combination of me being a woman and the fact that I think critically does not make me a feminist.
what is so radical about a woman birthing original thought?
feel sorry for me even though I dont deserve it.
photos from a january trip to california. a heavy week for a vacation.
shoot styled in collaboration with smartypants vintage
a dedication to our earth.
words and creativity are hard to come as a plague of corrupt people continue to pollute our planet.
photos taken outside of a recently abandoned hotel. the only thing that makes these few photos a series is their shared location.
(too many photos of kyle. a certain science happens with me behind the camera and him in front of it.)
midnight moments. up too late, late in the year.
inspo in the thrift store parking lot on new year's day. do not doubt the ability of a new-to-you, 1960s track jacket to inspire an entire day.
people are intimidated to be creative. when the purpose of being creative is simply to connect with friends, it takes the pressure to produce something outstanding out of the equation.
these photos were experimental and unserious. making them let us learn a little more about one another on a Friday night.
my first choice in communicating is rarely ever verbal. i default to listening or thinking, and find comfort in not finding the right words to say. we all experience the world differently, and words land with us uniquely, while photos and art allow for deviation in interpretation, space for varying impressions, in their nature. i enjoy leaving questions unanswered in conversation; photography allows me to communicate without giving everything away.
recently, however, i have found a new love for spoken language. i am once again intimidated and inspired by the power of words through a new endeavor that completely relies on verbalizing physical feeling and emotion thought.
the points on the spine where one type of vertebra ends and another type of vertebra begins are the weakest parts of the back. i find this to be an illuminating metaphor for the transitions of life. for those moments where we recognize there is opportunity for both risk and transformation, when we are between one thing and the next and leave space for vulnerability. i am one to both welcome and dread these moments.
self portraits taken home alone on a friday night. the only thing to make these past few weeks any better has been this and other creative outlets. finding therapy in the creative process and in very few other places.